After thirteen years in the Air Force, my dad decided it was time for a change. So, we moved from Colorado to Texas, where I spent most of my elementary school days. Five years into that journey, my parents decided my dad should re-enlist, sending our family to Cheyenne, Wyoming.
Not long after we arrived in October, I saw a flyer at the base recreation center inviting youth to a Halloween party. Without hesitation, I began working on my parents for transportation and plans for my costume.
The memory is telling. I went to the party without knowing anyone. I scanned the room for friendly adult faces and started helping. By the end of the party, I made new friends, but none were my age.
Halloween would have been quite different if we had stayed in Texas, close to family and school friends. Instead, that year revealed an early sign of my operating style: my go-to is always helping. It’s the simplest form of generosity, and always available.
A few days later, I trick-or-treated in our new neighborhood with large flakes of snow falling all around me. Today, Texas weather hints that fall is coming. But instead of snowing at Halloween, I’m looking forward to family and friend gatherings where generosity shows up in all kinds of ways.
I find myself reflecting on my life’s journey and all the forms of generosity that have carved deep paths along the way.
Looking back, I realize I’ve been exploring the same question from many different directions: What shapes the way we give?
Generosity is a story that starts in childhood, shapes our values, follows us through life’s experiences and the questions we ask, and then flows into the next generation. I’ve returned to these ideas over the years.
Generosity starts early. I wrote about growing the next generation in “Let them grow. Let them give.”
Generosity changes as we do. It is a story that changes over a donor’s lifetime. And relationships between donors and nonprofits evolve, creating tremendous opportunity and lasting change. I described it as an elephant in “Seeing the whole elephant.”
Good giving requires questions. Of course, I can’t reflect on generosity without including my favorite giving tool. I write about the importance of questions in almost every blog. One of my favorites explores questions that lead us toward answers: “Pondering philanthropy questions from a ‘little old lady‘”
A follow-up to the “Little Old Lady” offers tips for getting the information we need to make an informed decision about a gift. I shared those tips in “Why it’s important to get the answers you need before you give.” But before you get too far down the decision road, consider my “just gotta ask” and my “hard questions” from “Curiosity triggers valuable ideas.”
Generosity is about relationships, not just transactions. Conversations with donors, volunteers, friends and family can uncover new interests, deepen relationships and reveal opportunities we might miss. The key is listening, a skill that is seldom second nature. “The art of listening: A skill that builds better donor relationships” describes listening as panning for gold and discovering nuggets of insight left in the pan to inform your next giving decision.
Generosity flows forward to the next generation. Finally, let’s circle back to the next generation, always eager to hurry up while we’re struggling to teach the value of generosity. Doesn’t it make sense that we would start at the beginning with “How to raise kids to make, save, and give money”
They are growing fast, hurrying out the door, around the corner, out of sight. Keeping up is essential in answering another question: How do we learn from them? I explore that question in “The next generation isn’t waiting. Why are we?”
On reflection, I find generosity, giving, questions, relationships and family at the center of my personal giving journey. I started by helping, learned from adults modeling generosity, and now I’m learning from the generations coming behind me.
And perhaps that’s what I’ve learned most from looking back: generosity isn’t something we master. It keeps changing as we do. We learn from those who came before us, practice what we’ve learned, and then discover that the next generation has something to teach us, too.
I think there just may be another story here. I’ll share that one on our next The Road Ahead …
Read it. Share it. Pass it on.
If you have a question or a topic you would like to see explored in future posts, please reach out to me.
The Gift of Giving by Dawn Franks is a practical, inspiring guide to living with purpose through generosity. Filled with real-world wisdom, it encourages readers to make a meaningful difference and leave a lasting legacy. Click to learn more about The Gift of Giving.
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